Glimpse of what is to come

 

Jesus, I know you are powerful. You holds the future. Your Word is true, and Your promises are sure! Lord, I love You.

This morning, I woke up with an unusual feeling. I had a dream… in that dream I was a mother. I was caring for my baby with so much love and tenderness, and my ‘husband’ was simply watching me quietly as I take this little one close to my chest. Even right after I open my eyes from sleep, I still weirdly feel what it truly means to be a mother. It was breathtaking! It seemed like I was watching a movie but I was the actress on that main scene! And even though I couldn’t recognize my husband's face, I sensed his presence. He was there sitting close to me, steady and near.

I love that feeling, Lord. I truly want that kind of blissfulness. I wonder was that dream your response to my prayer last night? Could it be a glimpse of what’s to come? My heart is hoping and praying that role will not remain as a dream… but soon will turn into reality. The role and responsibility that I will lovingly embrace.

And speaking of dreams, last Monday, I received a chat message from a colleague at CBN (700Club) Asia. It's quite a long time since our last chat, Ate Rain wrote that she dreamt about me. In her dream was my wedding day! I was gently putting on my wedding gown, and Mama was right there, patiently helping me get ready. She was happy and present. Though the groom wasn’t revealed on my dream, the feeling of joyful anticipation filled the moment. It was my wedding and I was being prepared.

As I reflected on these two dreams, a gentle realization settled in my heart: You’re not only preparing me for marriage, but also for something greater, a purpose that might be deeply connected to this life aspect, I feel toward becoming a Licensed Marriage and Family Counselor. Every time I attend Dr. Bolet Bautista’s M&F counseling class, I feel a spark in my spirit, like something inside me comes alive, I feel so thrilled and connected. Hence, perhaps, this is a new gift you've planted inside in my heart, something that's birthing from within. And maybe, just maybe, the reason Mama appeared in that dream is because she’s been a part of my preparation from the very beginning. In fact, in many ways, she was seemingly my very first “client” and I say that with love and a little smile.

Growing up, Mama shared her heart with me, both the joys and the struggles in her marriage with Papa. Through her stories, I’ve come to realize that there really is no such thing as a perfect marriage. I used to believe in that "love conquers all" kind of idea, but I’ve learned that love in marriage is more than a feeling, it’s a daily choice. A commitment to wake up next to your spouse, even on days when they are unlovable. What I’ve witnessed in Mama is a quiet strength that flows from selfless love. She sacrificed so much, choosing to honor and submit to Papa’s decisions, even when it meant letting go of things she deeply desired. And in Papa, I saw a different kind of strength and courage. I see that he loves Mama, but perhaps not in ways she hope to feel. I appreciate that he took bold steps of faith to build and provide for our family, even when the path ahead wasn’t clear.

Now, in this season, I feel like I’m learning, contemplating and slowly understanding this one of the most precious events in someone’s life. I’ve been journeying with Mom, hearing her stories, offering thoughts, and praying with her. Through her realizations, I guess I’ve learned so much about what it takes to build and sustain a marriage (oh how I wish!). She constantly reminds me to pray intentionally not just for any man but for a spouse who loves and honors You deeply. One who is not only good in courting, but also seriously paying attention to what God is doing to us and through us.

That doesn’t mean I shouldn’t look for someone like Papa, after all, he is my father, and there are so many qualities I admire about him. His humor, his endurance, his integrity, his unwavering drive to provide, his love for the family, these are just few of the many things I deeply love about my father. But I believe Mama simply wanted me to see a different portrait of marriage, a version I truly desire to embody. One built not just on love and sacrifice, but also on emotional connection, spiritual depth, and a partnership that reflects Your heart.

If others, like Mom and many women I know, didn’t somehow get the expectation and love they hoped for… then please let my story be different. Let my future marriage reflect your faithfulness and glory. Let it be something that points people back to you, a beautiful testimony to your design of husband and wife.

By your grace, I believe in faith, you will not only make me get the kind of marriage I pray to have, but also you'll enable me of counseling couples, deeply effective in guiding them through wisdom of your Word, compassion, and truth.

Jesus, honestly… I’m so excited. I know You’re working in my life in ways far beyond what I can see. And everything I’m experiencing now is part of the purpose you’ve planned for me.

That’s why I trust you!

I may not know when these dreams come in reality but I will wait until my heart completely feel and see. 

Thank You for giving me hope, for calling me to something greater. 

You are, and always will be, the King of my heart.

All praises to You!